sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
