the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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