Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
