Your mouth is God's brothel.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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