i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
