return my video game
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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