so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
foreskin is a definite game changer
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
