Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize