Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
