I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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