you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
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