I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Randomize
