Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Alive.
So much puke
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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