Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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