we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
