I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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