so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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