Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
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They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
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Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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