We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize