Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize