Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i walk over a car last night?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize