dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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