Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
