I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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