on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
