ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
