just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
