the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
