whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
someone owes me an orgasm
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
