Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I need water and some morals
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
