its not stalking. its research.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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