I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
