Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Randomize
