My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
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