So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
