She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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