how do flat chested girls get laid?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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