so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
