I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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