did you get engaged???
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I understand Curling. That high.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize