Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
