I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
