this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
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