Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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