Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
