Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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