Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
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When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
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Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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