Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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