yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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