How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
